11 Personalities promising to ruin your Super Bowl Party
January 31, 2008
www.cracked.com
The Guy Who Hasn't Paid Attention to the NFL in a Decade
He won't be able to get over the fact that the 49ers aren't in it this year and may ask if Reggie White or Walter Payton still play football. If you're bored, it's fun to make football references to him all night so he feels like he is some sort of eunuch-like non-man.
The Guy Who's in It for the Commercials
He won't pay attention to the game, but he'll shoot to the TV like a laser when the commercials come on. He'll spend the first few minutes after each commercial break--important plays or not--analyzing what everyone else just saw, routinely mentioning that "that last ad was pretty good, but not even close to the George Costanza Rold Gold ad in '98 or the P-Diddy Pepsi truck ad in '04." This guy also probably loved the Bud Bowl and will get really quiet and attentive during the ads for E.D. drugs.
The "Tomorrow Should Definitely Be a National Holiday" Guy
In this tool's view, a day when everyone's hung-over and unproductive would fit perfectly on the federal holiday ledger between the day in mid-January commemorating civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. and the day in mid-February commemorating Presidents Abraham Lincoln and George Washington.
-SoxisSickies
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